the law of the playground

"the least coherent encyclopaedia of playground insults on the internet"

The Law of the Playground: The Book

The Law of the Playground is now a book, available at all good bookstores or online courtesy of the sales robots at Amazon, who are offering 20% off, making it just £5.59!

Don't be a penny-pincher - you can't pinch 559 pennies! Your hands aren't big enough, so stop acting like they are!

Still not convinced? Perhaps these 100% genuine* reviews by satisfied readers will persuade you of the book's worth. And mirth.

Just put it underneath a big set of dictionaries. Those idiots at the Amazon checkout'll never see it there!

Mrs Q, Penge

I would buy this book, if I weren't dead. What a plot twist! It's like Sixth Sense, and The Others, isn't it? I was dead all the time. And you thought I was alive. You idiot.

Maj. H. Grit (Ret)

Although it would be an exaggeration to say that I cannot put this book down (I am perfectly capable of "putting it down"), I choose never to do so, and I will scream if anyone tries to make me.

Eileen Spnuge, Doncaster

Before buying this book, I was a puny eight stone weakling, with normal female breasts. Now I'm uselessly oversized and people cross the street with one hand over their mouth to avoid me. Thanks, Law of the Playground!

Grace Floggett, Barnet

I've had this facial expression since 1956, so it was a relief to read this utterly fantastic book, and finally have an appropriate use for it.

Elsie Snebbits, Chichester

If you don't buy this book, it will remain a maddening mystery that will claw at your brain for the rest of your life. Don't let the absence of this book fuel a spiral of insanity; just buy it and know the peace that comes from owning a perfect thing.

'Uncle' Tom Shrimpney, Shrewsbury

Go on. Buy the book and make us proud.

* the reviews are, in fact, 100% made up.

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